I blog post I wrote one year ago and never published until today…

From my drafts, written December 9th, 2011

Time really flies by. Like the phrase used in the Bible “in the blink of an eye” it will happen in a moment. I’ve never felt old up until recently. I’m so young in my twenty three years, but somehow I feel like I’ve already had more experiences than most people have a in lifetime. Growing up… sometimes it feels as though it wasn’t a choice I made, it just happened! I’m not quite sure when I exactly turned the corner and became an adult, but every time I’m reminded of this fact it’s so surprising! You would think being married would serve as a reminder that I’m not a teenager anymore, but that’s not it. This past week Amy Moller and I were holding two Booth babies in our arms in the kitchen of the house that Jamie and Becky bought. TWO boys. It felt like a dream for a moment. Remember five [now six] years ago when Felipe was alive and we were all at Richardson’s after Sunday night service? Then we’d go back to the Booth apartment that smelled like weed and watch Friends and we would just love being together. Remember when your friends were everything? We had a such a close group of friends that we were truly one another’s family. I really miss that support and stability. I remember Kendra had long light brown hair and braces. I remember Jen’s crazy laugh. So many things have changed since then. All of a sudden it becomes a little more clear to me when I had to grow up.

“The thing is there is never a time when you will be more honest, and your convictions will be stronger, and your motives will be more pure than they are right now. Which means you should chase whatever excites you. Be confident, and take risks, and paint over my words so you can start writing your own. My story may have inspired you, but I’m certain your story will inspire the next girl to live in our room. I want you to know you don’t need somebody to write about you in order for your life to mean something. You can write about yourself… make your own destiny. Then years from now the next girl will keep what you write on that door long enough to remind you how inspired your life is. And you can tell that girl to paint over the door because you realize the words you wrote, the friends you had, the urgency you felt will always be there under the paint. The love you professed will always be there, the spark of something undeniable, a seed of hope, the truth for better or for worse burning fiercely just below the surface.” -Peyton Sawyer, One Tree Hill

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